Betty Please, Pick Up Your Crackers!

Holy cow.. it's another Daring Bakers challenge post! Firstly, a huge huge THANK YOU! and WELL DONE! to our lovely hosts, Natalie of Gluten A Go Go and Shel of Musings From The Fishbowl. As you might tell from Natalie's blog title, she bakes gluten free and Shel bakes vegan - so this month we all had the opportunity to step outside our comfort zones and do the same if we wished. This was not mandatory, as us regular old wheat flour and butter lovin' people could bake this recipe without taking a walk on the wild gluten-free side. BUT we did have to come up with a vegan dip or spread to slather our crackers in as a bonus challenge.. which was very cool as well! There was so much we could do to personalize our crackers/dips and still stick to the recipe as written. I heart that. :) But I can't say I was much of a Daring baker this month as I did end up choosing to play it safe and made the Lavash Crackers with your every day bread flour. Then again.. any day I'm in the kitchen baking - it's always ALWAYS a DARING experience. First off let me say.. I need kneading lessons. Big time. I do not know the proper way to knead so I have no idea if I was doing good or doing really bad. The crackers turned out tasty, but I haven't the faintest if they turned out "Lavash" or not.. course even if I did know how to knead, I wouldn't know if my crackers turned out like they should as I've never had a Lavash cracker before a week ago! Go me! The rolling of the dough was like a dream.. I suck at rolling too.. I couldn't roll out dough in a circle, square or rectangle to save my life. Even if I shape the shit first! Which I did - into a rectangle! But the minute I started rolling it started to look like fakkin' Sicily. Yanno.. boot shaped?? Jebus. So the "diamonds" I had intended to cut were uhh.. leaning and unsightly. Gah. I rolled the dough super thin - you could see the counter top in areas underneath.. but they still poofed up a bit in the oven. So the center of the sheet of crackers was a bit chewy and the edges were hard. I didn't really get much of a cracker feel. Although we did find a few that were crisp. But all of it was very tasty - even considering I went all Plain Jane and just sprinkled some Maldon sea salt on top. :) For my bonus vegan challenge, well.. I used this opportunity to do a test run in the making of homemade jam. You see, I've decided that not only will I be catering my own wedding reception with the help of my friends, but I'm also going to make my own wedding favors.. jam. Everyone will receive a wee jar of jam and a wee bag of shortbread cookies to go with. Actually that's pretty laughable considering how much I tend to set things afire. Uhh.. I might have to put the Creampuff in charge of the shortbread. :P Anyhoo.. the jam. I went with a small recipe for peach jam. Basically peaches, sugar and lemon juice and that's it. The recipe said to only cook for approximately 25 to 30 minutes but at that point I still had syrup with chunks of half hard peaches in it. I ended up cooking the jam for well over an hour. The nice thing about it was that I could stir every few minutes and not worry about the peaches sticking to the pan. Until... About 5 minutes before that jam was done.. I turned my back on it for FIFTEEN SECONDS - TOPS! - and that mother hummer burnt on me. I swear, I turned my back to wring out the towel, turned right back and continued stirring, but all my peaches were stuck to the bottom and had turned a most appetizing shade of puke brown. Fakkers. While this was happening, my 2nd sheet of crackers was in the oven. Mmm hmmm.. anyone care to guess where this is going? To hell. That's where it's going, gone and went. Burnt my 2nd sheet to a rock hard brown. It was at this point that I started to laugh.. once again that familiar zing that starts deep down in my tummy and travels up until my cheeks burn a bright red and I question my sanity in thinking that I can bake. :P What got me giggling was this reminded me of two of my most favorite women on the face of this planet - Laverne DeFazio and Shirley Feeney. You know.. "One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight! Schlemiel! Schlimazel! Hasenpfeffer Incorporated!" Ya'll remember the diner episode? Lenny inherits his uncle Lazlo's diner and Laverne & Shirley end up working in it - Laverne was the short order cook and Shirley was the waitress.. fakkin hysterical. Laverne calls Shirley "Betty" the whole episode and all you keep hearing over the PA system is Laverne saying "Betty Please.. Pick Up" At first it's going well and then they get really busy and both are lookin' a little worn, to say the least - Laverne's cooking is starting to look scary and at one point there is a table of biker chicks demanding their hashbrowns.. of course Laverne burns them and the next thing you hear is, "Betty Please.. Pick up your.. hashblacks." BAHAHAHAHAHAHAA! I am so Laverne! Okay well you hadda be there.. but that's what popped into my mind when I saw my burnt crackers and burnt peach jam. It was classic. :) Well to sum up the whole experience - the first batch of crackers were edible and tasty, but not very cracker like. The jam didn't look like peach jam, but there was no burnt taste to it so if you closed our eyes you'd know you were eating peach jam. heee! The two together were excellent because of the salty bread/cracker and the sweet fruit jam. And I learned more very valuable lessons - do not even breathe during the last 5 to 10 minutes of cooking your jam.. just stand there and stir. And do not attempt to bake crackers (or anything for that matter) while making jam. :P Thanks for another fabulous challenge, gals! I never ever would have made crackers at home if it weren't for The Daring Bakers! You can make them too! Just go to Gluten A Go Go and Musings From The Fishbowl for the recipe - both the original and the gluten free recipes. :) xoxo

101 Calorie Springrolls with a side of 3908 Calorie Fried Zucchini :)

I figured the goodness of the springrolls would certainly outweigh or equal out the badness of the fried zucchini. Yes? No? Too bad.. both were equally delicious :D We're on vacation this week! WOO HOO! We've done absolutely NOTHING! Not so woo hoo. We've had plans.. and then things have popped up totally destroying our plans.. we ended up doggie babysitting for 2 days, killing our plans to head out to some fresh air markets we've never been to. The weather has not cooperated, squashing our desire to get out on the lake.. BUT there has been no work so therefore, we are happy campers. heee! One thing we discussed at the beginning of our vacation was that we had been straying from our Cooking Light recipe list the past couple weeks and that we wanted to get back on schedule again. So I've picked 5 recipes for our dining pleasure this week and being Wednesday, we finally tried the first one. Gah. Okay so being on vacation kinda takes away the desire to prepare dinner every night. Who knew? Anyhoo, we did try one tonight and it was another winner from Cooking Light. Please try to contain your jealousy over my hot pink styrofoam plates :P Fresh Spring Rolls with Dipping Sauce was easy to prepare, I got to work with rice paper spring roll wrappers - something I've never done before, and they were incredibly good. Add to it, only 101 calories, 0.8 grams of fat and 16.8 grams of carbs for TWO rolls PLUS 2 teaspoons of the dipping sauce and I'd say this recipe is a keeper for sure! Following the measurements exactly, this recipe does not make 6 spring rolls as stated. I have no idea how they came up with that number, because I got 12 HUGE spring rolls and still threw the left over ingredients into a salad. Not to mention, they called it "6 appetizer servings" - at the size they ended up being, using 3 strips of this and that and 4 slices of halved shrimp, they turned out to be as big as your average eggroll from many Asian restaurants. I could not even finish ONE of them. Hubbs had 2. We had 9 left over. Thank goodness we had some unexpected company show up.. they took the 9 home with them. :) Crispedy carrots, cukes, bell peppers and bean sprouts.. I added a couple strips of spring onion as well.. decided against the lettuce and went with a small handful of baby spinach instead and 2 (size 26-31) shrimp sliced in half were piled into the middle of the spring roll wrapper that had been softened in warm water - then wrapped around the contents snugly. The dipping sauce was super easy as well.. a matter of juicing a lime and whisking in a few other ingredients. Once I got the hang of dealing with the sticky rice paper, the rolling went quickly and I had a dozen spring rolls in less than 30 minutes. Delish! As a side dish.. heh heh.. we took advantage of the first harvest of zucchini from our garden. Most gals living a lifestyle change, would steam or grill the zucchini. Thank GAWD I'm not most gals. Oh hells no. I dredged each zuke coin into an egg, then flour, salt and pepper.. then I dropped those beauties into a skillet containing sizzling hot canola oil and fried 'em up to golden brown perfection! teee! C'mon.. you can't fault me for that can you? I know Hubbs didn't.. if we weren't already an old married couple, I'd bet my last dollar that he would have proposed tonight by the look on his face when he ate the first fried slice of zucchini heaven. :) I've got 4 more recipes to go.. with 3 days left (can't count Saturday- we're headed out to my hometown for a slumber party at my soul sistah's house - I will not be held accountable for anything that passes these lips that night as I can guarantee after 3/4 of a bottle of vodka it will be a free for all) ***crickets*** Wait. That didn't sound right. Uhmm.. 'kay never mind. Anyhoo.. 4 recipes left - ya'll might see another post here again this month before the Daring Baker challenge. I KNOW! I'll be shocked too! heheee xoxo

Time to Make the... Fritters!

So in my last post I wrote about two of my most favoritest people on the face of this planet. Well this post is all about two more of my most favoritest people on the planet, Helene and Gracie. I am so going to get yelled at, but... Helene called today, like she does often - bless her cute lil cotton socks. :) It was a very uneventful conversation as both of our lives have been pretty tame this past week. She's been busy with her mom who is visiting from France and I have been busy with work. So why am I even mentioning this phone call? Because I'm wicked. But in a good way? MUAHAHAHA Anyhoo, at the end of the conversation I mentioned that I had taken out ingredients to do some baking this weekend and before I could tell her what I was baking, she interrupts with, "You'll be making doughnuts, right?" I didn't say much to that, other than I had hoped that I would be able to get the doughnuts made and that we'd see. She then told me that she wouldn't be mad if I couldn't squeeze the doughnuts in and I said that I knew she wouldn't be. The whole time not one giggle escaped my lips. But they wanted to!! As! If! I would not be contributing to this awesome event called, Time to Make the Doughnuts! Gracie and Helene came up with the idea of holding an event chock full of doughy delights known as the doughnut - and every variation thereof. :) I've never made a doughnut before, but as my ass & hips can attest, I've eaten my fair share. I've always wanted to make doughnuts - the kind that are fluffy and airy on the inside, with a soft crust that is enrobed in a sugary glaze. But I figured that doughnut will most likely be made by someone else, so I spent a week searching recipes and doing a lil research until I decided that I wanted to go the fritter route. There use to be this lil doughnut shop on my way to work which was owned by a friend. So every morning, I'd stop in and grab a cup of her coffee and her deeeee-licious apple fritters. Oh my God they were so good! The fritter was the big puffy and airy doughnut that I described earlier, but there were chunks of apples and raisins throughout the dough. The whole thing was covered in a crispy glaze that was actually more buttery than sweet. And they were HUGE! Seriously huge. One of those and I'd be good until late in the afternoon. Unfortch, my friend decided to get out of the business, so she sold it to someone else who only makes wedding cakes. What Evah. Okay now here's where this post stops making any sense.. I found a recipe that I knew was going to produce big fat apple fritters like the kind I ate at my friend's shop. They are a Dutch fritter called Olie Bollen, traditionally served on New Years Day. I saved the recipe and I printed the recipe, but ultimately, I didn't make them (yet). No.. because I never know when to stop browsing recipes. Hours, I could spend HOURS looking through cookbooks, mags and websites and never get bored. So that's what happened here. I found another recipe that I decided to go with because there was a sauce that went with them, and who am I to pass up a delectable sweet sauce? The recipe I went with is called Pan-fried Apple Fritters with Apple/Honey Dipping Sauce. I came across this recipe on a new website to me called, Care2. It's a great site focusing on living green, healthy living and human rights. I found this recipe in their Green Living area. These fritters are really easy to make, and can be residing happily in your tummy in under an hour. They are crispy on the outside and so tender and moist on the inside. These fritters are made with grated apples, which really lends to the moistness of the dough even though you squeeze all of the juice out for the sauce. I will be making these over and over again, of this you can be assured. The dipping sauce is delish, but these fritters don't necessarily need dipping. They are just sweet enough and again, very moist on their own. But, never one to pass up a chance to gild the lily, I decided to spoon the sauce over a couple of them. Heavenly. But very, very sweet. Hubbs ate his plain and demanded these be breakfast every Saturday morning from now on. Which is shocking because he's such an eggs, sausage, hashbrown kinda guy, yanno? heee! The only change I made to this recipe was to add the raisins and I used cardamom instead of ginger. And the only other change I'll make to this recipe in the future, is to cut the honey in the sauce from 1/2 cup to 1/4 cup so that the apple juice stands out more. Speaking of that sauce, it gave me another idea which I plan on trying in the very near future. A syrup made from reduced apple juice and a couple tablespoons of honey and then used as a sweetener in my tea. I'm thinking the combination of the apple fritters with a hot cup of apple induced tea is going to be THE BOMB, baby! I urge each and every one of you to make these lil fritters, I highly doubt you'll be disappointed. :) Thanks Gracie!! Thanks Helene!! Love yous guys! xoxo

Two of My Favorite People and Their Yumminesses!

Yeah.. it's my new word. Problem with that? :P Yumminess.. and adjective that describes both Kelly and Ivonne as well as their cooking! :) Reading Kelly's blog is just a sheer delight.. this woman can cook! She always seems to cook food that I'd love to eat and believe it or not, I am kinda picky when it comes to what trips my food trigger. True story! So when I saw her Blueberry and Mascarpone pancakes.. kids, my trigger had done tripped. I could not wait to try them for myself. And I did, that very weekend. Hubbs and I agreed, unarguably, that Kel's pancakes were the BEST blueberry pancakes we've! ever! had! Hands down, game over.. I will not eat another blueberry pancake ever! again! Seriously. The pancakes are kind of on the sweet side - or maybe they seem that way because of the tart blueberries. I dunno. But it was the perfect balance between tart and sweet for me. Of course I doused them in real maple syrup, but I tried a bite of the very last one that neither of us could manage to finsh, sans the maple-y goodness, and I'll be damned if it wasn't spectacular all on it's own. Oh no.. no syrup needed, my friends. This pancake is all inclusive! It's the whole package without the frilly wrappings and accoutrements! If you've never taken my advice before, and I can't say that I blame you if you haven't.. but TRUST ME on this.. try these pancakes. Like right now. GO. Kel's Blueberry Mascarpone Pancakes or The! Best! Blueberry! Pancakes! Ever! 1 1/2 c. flour 3 TBS. sugar 2 tsp. baking powder 1 1/2 tsp. kosher salt 1/2 c. mascarpone at room temperature 3/4 c. + 1 TBS. whole milk (I used 2% - it's all I had) 2 large eggs, slightly beaten 1 tsp. vanilla 1 tsp. lemon zest 1 c. blueberries (fresh or fresh frozen -- without juice) I used fresh frozen Preheat oven to 200º F. and then turn oven off. (Give yourself enough time to preheat the oven right before you start making your pancakes, so that you can turn it off right before the pancakes hit the griddle or frying pan. Heat a griddle or cast iron frying pan over medium-low heat. In a medium sized bowl, sift dry ingredients together. In another bowl, whisk mascarpone, milk, eggs, vanilla, and lemon zest until well combined. Pour into dry ingredients and mix just until incorporated. Add blueberries and stir carefully into mixture. Ladle mixture onto hot griddle or frying pan that's been greased with a lil butter or non-stick spray and cook until bubbles surface and the bottom is goldeny brown. Carefully flip pancakes over and cook until goldeny brown and delicious. Place pancakes on a dish and cover with aluminum foil. Keep dish in warmed oven until ready to serve. Serve with butter and real maple syrup or eat plain (so good!). And then there's Ivonne.. my partner in crime. The apple of my eye.. the cream in my coffee.. the ying to my yang, if you will. :) There's been many recipes of hers that I've made myself and documented on this blog and I'm sure there will be many more in the future. She had decided to submit something to this month's HHDD - Pizza. And in true Ivonne style, she did not disappoint in either taste or presentation. She made sweet pizza sticks.. fluffy dough, with dimples full of brown sugar and butter. She hooked me with the brown sugar, but she had me at butter. *swoon* I made them the very night I read about it on her blog. I simply couldn't wait! Basically, I thawed some of my pizza dough - you could use any plain pizza dough, make a sweet dough or use the dough recipe given on 80 Breakfasts. Flatten it out on a cookie sheet and use your finger tips, or knuckles if you have long nails, to dimple the dough. You can either brush melted butter on the doughy dimples or pour it on - but if you pour, be careful not to use too much. Then you simply sprinkle the brown sugar on top in an even layer. I also added 1/2 tsp. of cinnamon and 1 tsp. of cardamom to my brown sugar before sprinkling. I baked at 400º F. for about 15 - 20 minutes, when I noticed the crust was getting goldeny brown and the butter sugar topping was bubbly. (Is this the way you made it, Ivonne?) :) This is a great snack for movie watching or game playing. It's quite easy to eat and you can keep your fingers from getting greasy from the butter by hanging on the sides of the stick - yanno, so you don't butter up your Monopoly money or Wii controller. :P I also melted some left over ganache I had in my freezer for dipping purposes, and the dark chocolate ganache was a great match to the sweet dough. YUM! My only suggestion would be.. if there are only one or two of you enjoying this snack, I'd halve the recipe because these lil guys are pretty filling. :) Thanks for such delicious yumminesses, gals! Hugs and smoochies! xoxo